Today

Today, I am sick.  Today, I am taking care of two babies who are getting sick.  Alone.  I can't remember the last time Barry had to work on the weekend and today, he has to work.

Today, I just want my mom.

My mom was here for 3 weeks when the girls were born.  I needed her.  People would tell her, "I bet you don't want to leave because you will miss these babies too much!"  My mom's reply was always centered around the fact that she was worried about me doing it alone.  She would get frustrated when met with the reply of, "Oh, she'll be just fine!"

We've had so many people who have showed up with meals, helping get babies to bed, and providing some free babysitting.  We are so grateful for each and every one of those times other people generously offered their time, food and gifts.  You can sense the but coming here.  BUT, when it comes down to it, people are busy.  They have their own lives and their own responsibilities to juggle.  Your mom is one of the only people who will drop everything because you need her.  People telling my mom I'd be fine was a actually a compliment to me.  They see me as a strong and competent adult, which is a good thing.  A mom will always see you differently.  She looks at you and sees her baby.  The same baby she rocked with warm bottle of milk and reassured when bad dreams came.  The same baby who was scared of thunder and couldn't sleep with out a loved-to-pieces blanket or stuffed animal that she would do anything to get back when you left it somewhere.  When her baby needed her, she was there.  Time can't change that.

I was wondering the other day if my mom, grandmas, and great-grandmas slipped their finger into their baby's tiny hand as they slept like I did.  I wondered how many generations you could go back and catch a glimpse of a mom's finger wrapped up in hand of their sleeping child.  How many countries you could visit and see a similar scene.  If anything stays constant despite time and place, I imagine it would be a mother's love for her baby.

Even though today I want my mom and I can't have her here, I know I am blessed.  My mom is healthy and well, only a phone call away.  I know too many others who would give anything for their mom to be just a long drive or plane ride away.  She will be here again one day soon.  Just not today.